Waiting for my fifty dollar phone call...

Good Morning everyone...

Tomorrow is July 4th - people are giddily planning beach parties and fireworks displays, but not me. I could give a shit. Sitting at home waiting for the temp agencies to call me for a possible job that pays 10 dollars an hour and only lasts 1/2 the day. I can't go anywhere in the mornings and be productive because if they call me I have to be ready and go withing a few minutes. So today my window is a half hour more - then I am going to go to the gym and do some work for school. I have two brand new courses to put together - that is a lot of planning and a lot of reading as well. Yesterday I finally got called in to be a receptionist at a new Gay television network. Everyone was very nice, but they treat you like you have mental retardation because as a temp, there must be something wrong with you. If I was normal and intelligent, I wouldn't be answering phones and sorting press clippings. This has been the status quo of my life so far in LA. I thought it had finally ended with SAA until they coldly fucked me three ways till Tuesday. I hope that company goes down in flames.

Had a fun weekend. I went with the good doctor to try to get into the Widespread Panic show downtown. It was the last night of a sold-out three night run at a small, but historic theater. I couldn't give a rats ass about Widespread, but I live five minutes from downtown and it was something to do. The crackies were going to a big rave downtown which (aside from being with crackie #1) is not my idea of a good time. We waited a few hours outside passively hoping we could score some tickets. I personally had $20.00 to my name so you can imagine I wasn't trying that hard to get in. The GD has a friend who is a ticket guy - he gave us copies of someone's tickets and although it made me feel dirty, we attempted to get into the concert that way. Fortunately, it didn't work and I didn't have to show my fake stub to anyone since I was still being searched. My goody-goody instincts kicked in and I was so relieved that I didn't have to lie and try ot cheat the system - although f you add up all the ticketbastard fees I have paid over the years, I should have some frequent flier bonus miles in there for some free tickets!! We went around the building looking for a secret entrance to the outside smoking area, but it was well guarded. The scalper tried to bribe our way in but the guard there was having a serious moral dilemma and did not want to loose his job. I told them both that since I was desperate for a job - I could not be the cause of some guy loosing his - then I would never get lucky (they do connect I promise). Anyway - after a few drinks we went back to the back door man and he told us the heat was on and it wasn't going to happen. Relieved again we headed back to the bar where I sipped on champagne and listened with detached interest to the conversations of people who had no other interests in their lives except for music and going to concerts. I felt another wave of relief that I had finally gotten over that phase of my life, and that if pressed for conversation I could certainly discuss more than that time at Rich Stadium when Steve Miller opened up for The Dead and....

9:41....the odds of getting called are lessening by the minute. At this point, by the time I drive the hour to wherever the west side office is and park, I am not making any money and what is the point???? Grrrr damn that crazy British bitch! I have to submit another chapter sketch to my writing group by Saturday night so maybe I should get cracking on that too while I am sitting here in front of my computer.

I have to pay my bills today, but I know that once I do I won't have any money left and that scares the shit out of me. Keep your fingers crossed people.

Love,
Na-na