Respect

How do you earn respect from people? Is it from respecting them first, being a bitch and scaring people into respecting you? Or could it be that in order to gain respect from others, you need to first respect yourself. I have always had a bit of a problem with my students taking me seriously. I am smiley and goof around in class and like the kids to have a good time. BUT I also want them to work hard and be focussed. Usually I can get this done, but with freshman it is really difficult to make that change. You are not allowed to openly dislike students as a teacher. Everyday you are supposed to enter the classroom and pretend that they haven't disrespected you the day before, talked underneath their breath about you, walked in 15 minutes late without an excuse or any remorse or haven't turned in their homework in ages. You are supposed to smile and them and encourage them and you know what? I am done. I cannot wait for next year to start so I can lay my foot down and show them who is boss. It is so hard to be a new teacher - you are trying so hard to find your footing and figure everything out and while that is happening - students are counting on your to ground them and they are constantly judging you and waiting,watching to see when and if you will make a mistake. Now, insert privileged, bratty, entitled kids and multiply that by 100. It makes it hard to want to work hard and create amazing programs when no one appreciates it or takes it seriously. I miss public school. I miss being a rock for kids who have no one. I miss being able to guide lost souls in their search for themselves and their purpose. It just doesn't happen like that here. Sorry - I know that this isn't witty or snarky, but I felt like venting. Summer vacation is right around the corner - I have less than two weeks left with my seniors - it all seems so fast.

On another note, I got a call from my newest jdate friend who affectionately called me "psycho girl" on my voice mail. I may call him back this evening before Maj and see what he wants, but I don't want to be the one to ask him out. I want him to see that I am more than a crazy bad girl. I guess, I want a little respect.

I'll be back with the funny...promise

Na-na