Just when you thought things couldn't get worse..

I don't even know where to begin. I have had a night to sleep it off so it isn't as close to the surface but I had another "hell of a day" yesterday. I wont go into to too many details, but let's just say that I tried standing up for myself with an ex-boyfriend and it came flying in my face reminding me that I have no game when it comes to love and men and still have so much to learn. How is it that all of you manage to have real relationships with people - love people that love you back? You've all found people that want to share their time, their lives with you? No one ever tells me their secret. I think that sucks. So this all happened while I was at work - an easy temp job that I thought I had until the new job started. A new job that when I was sort of offered it did not make me feel good or happy or relieved. I do not really want to work there - it is a set up for disaster and I know I am only taking it (if it is really offered to me) is because I am desperate for money. This is never a good thing. Sooooo at 6pm last night I get a call from my temp agency telling me that my services are no longer needed at the company this is an HOUR after the sign-up to be on the temp list for Monday - fucking assholes. I hang up the phone and ask the other temp there if HE was asked back - he says yes and I remember a call he got hours before telling him that he was staying - something stinks here. On her way out, the woman I was working for asks me "So you got a job?" "Uh, sort of" I replied. See - I knew that I was working for the woman that started the company with the other lady that said she may be hiring me. (I understand that this may be hard to follow.) I told her where I was maybe going and she pulled me into her office and brought in another agent as well. The two of them told me, begged me really not to take the job. That it wouldn't last. They said that the devision I would be heading up didn't even have any clients and that she was hiring me with no experience to do something with nothing. All of this I knew. I asked them if they could help me find something else then since they were telling me how wonderful I was balh balh ablh. IT was awful and uncomfortable and made me even more confused than I alrady am...not to mention the very awkward call from one of the other agents at the agency I might be working for I got the other day. She called me up and had nothing to say to me - it was soooooo weird......bad news - red lights flashing in my face telling me to run run run. And now I am running to Runyan to have a hike and start my day.

Much love

Na-na